jan.31.2026
3:52pm
this week has been pretty bummy of me.
I rarely got out the house because of the snowstorm, I didn't really do much with my hobbies, and I mainly spent most of my time on the phone with my friends. sure, I finished my first ever issue for a zine I've been working on for about a month and I just finished every page on the website, but since I have so many projects that I want to do and so many that I haven't finished, I still feel extremely lazy.
the only time I actually got out of my house was on the 24th, and the only times I got out since then was just to shovel the snow out of the driveway or sidewalk.
I'm honestly kind of worried about february. when I get back to school, my ap classes have to catch up on 2 weeks worth of schoolwork because of the snowstorm, I have to go back and forth on mock trial games and rehearsals for the school's musical, and my college acceptance letter is coming in a few days, and I'm still a little bit anxious about it. it's genuinely going to be as packed as january and I didn't even like january as much. this month is a 4/10, I deadass started the year off with some bullshit.
- gabe.
jan.28.2026
7:47pm
doomscrolling has been getting so boring lately. instagram reels haven't been hitting, youtube shorts is too generic, twitter started to lose its steam of hatred. I honestly had to find a different social media site to get addicted too because everything else isn't giving me that dopamine rush anymore, so I downloaded pinterest.
pinterest is genuinely a cool app, it's like scrolling through an infinite vision board. I was only on it for about 2 hours and it already shows me the shit I want to see. speaking of which, I started checking out magazine covers for inspiration, and pinterest is stacked with that kind of shit, as well as other aesthetics that I like.
the whole yellowjournal idea I want to do is honestly my new obsession, especially since I want to focus more on design with it. however, as cool as yellowjournal is in terms of color, I want it to be more colorful instead of monochromatic. I'll think of something later on.
- gabe.
jan.27.2026
2:50pm
people need to shovel their snow on the sidewalks in my neighborhood, it's pissing me off that I have to walk on the road to go somewhere.
I walked about 2 miles to get to staples to pickup my copies of the yellowjournal. once I looked at it, I already noticed it wasn't printed all the way.
was a little irritated seeing it at first, but now I realized it's something I just have to fix in the next issue.
- gabe.
jan.26.2026
8:23pm
finished making my first ever zine. gonna promote it pretty much everywhere.
also bought about two copies so I'm going to pick it up tomorrow at my local staples.
- gabe.
jan.26.2026
3:35pm
busy ass few weeks.
I've been so drained from mock trial games and festival workshops that I literally went home and took a 22 hour nap over the weekend.
I already forgot that I had work to finish over the past week and honestly, I don't even see the point in turning it in late. I still passed the quarter with a 3.5 so I'm not complaining on having bad grades (at least in my standards).
- gabe.
jan.11.2026
3:06pm
Been trying to get my priorities straight.
I finished my css profile on wednesday, tried studying for mock trial during a game on thursday, and over the weekend I had to practice for an audition for the school's musical. I haven't had time to do any hobbies since I'm busy with my extracirriculars, but I haven't had time to focus on certain ones since I'm busy with thinking about doing my hobbies, and that kinda leads me to feel like I've been doing nothing in my life.
I wanted to start editing again, but I have to focus on catching up on journaling, but I can't because I have to practice for my audition, but I haven't had the time because I was too busy studying for mock trial, but I barely started studying these past few days because I was so focused on getting community service for NHS, but I'm struggling to turn it in because I'm busy with something else, and it just cycles and it just leaves me feeling drained and burnt out.
It's been a long while since I had time to focus on one thing, or at least where I never felt too busy mentally.
- gabe.
jan.6.2026
8:49pm
I'm genuinely fried and tired. since I started school this week, I've been on a major jet lag. I obviously stayed up pretty late over winter break, but it feels terrible to wake up at 6:30am again. It's gotten to the point where I have to sleep around 9pm to at least get a managable time to wake up. and it doesn't help that I have to get back to studying on mock trial, drama club auditions, and pre-calc tests this whole month.
over the break, it was probably the first time in a while where I never had to stress over schoolwork or my grades. I have no missing assignments, and my grades are good enough to help me sleep at night. but immediately getting back to work hit like whiplash.
- gabe.
jan.3.2026
12:48am
my god, I feel like a shitty person. I've been carring unnessecary baggage, avoiding problems that are too easy to fix, and it's worse when someone offers you advice out loud and it just feels embarrasing to hear once I realized I've been the problem all along and it's something I've been well aware of but afraid to admit.
Being evasive has been a growing habit for a while now and I haven't been the type of person to really reach out to anyone but I never really complain once it started to affect me and no one tends to really mention it until it actually becomes a problem whenever someone gets irritated of me. My family has been well aware of this problem since I never text them back.
My main new year's resolution was to just be more active around the people I'm still with and ngl it just feels sad that I have to start this habit at my big age, but at least I'm willing to make a change.
- gabe.
jan.2.2026
12:50am
so one of my friends has this tradition where every year on the first day, the first 12 songs he listens to represents a theme for each month, and I decided to do that myself. these were my first 12 songs of 2026:
January - Chivalry Is Not Dead by Hiatus Kaiyote
February - Miracles by Jennifer Viban
March - I See You by Best Man
April - Satellites by Ravyn Lanae
May - TRUST! by JPEGMAFIA
June - NEMO! by JPEGMAFIA
July - HAZARD DUTY PAY! by JPEGMAFIA
August - BMT! by JPEGMAFIA
September - UNTITLED by JPEGMAFIA
October - FLAME EMOJI! by JPEGMAFIA
November - Heroes by David Bowie
December - BODYGUARD! by JPEGMAFIA
I feel like this year is gonna be focused on me being full of myself.
- gabe.
jan.1.2026
4:41am
have a new year. this year is either gonna make or break me because there is too much on the line here. got so much things to do and too much to prepare. I should probably go to bed tho.
- gabe.